Tuesday, January 3, 2017

I’m Back!

Hello Everyone! Happy New Year!

After nearly a year away, I am back to writing. As you can see I’ve made quite afew changes to the look and layout of this blog; a small part of a larger set of changes I’ve been going through for the last 3 months.

I ended up not going to Under the Sea after all and I won’t be going to the next SFE event in Spain either. But I did still take my trip to Europe anyway. It was incredible. I honestly achieved a lot through this trip and it helped my confidence a lot considering I planned the trip more or less all by myself. I never felt like I was capable of doing such a thing. I’m now very excited to start traveling a lot more now, no longer for conventions or lolita events but just in general. There are so many places I want to go, so much I want to do. It’s funny that out of such a long spell of depression and anguish I feel more determined than ever to be happy and live out my dreams.

Even though honestly 2016 was not very eventful outside my trip, and the collapse of my countries moral fiber, which is beside the point.

I have not fully given up lolita yet, but I am more and more moving away from the community as a whole and selling more of my items. I have few plans for conventions in the future, no more staffing at Katsucon either. As of now I will only go to conventions if at least 3 of my very close friends go too or an extremely high priority guest is announced. Though it was painful at first, I’m becoming more content with my decisions. I’m moving forward into a new and important chapter of my life and I’m looking forward to sharing it with you all.

As of now my only plans are returning to school in afew months and taking another trip to Europe soon. One thing that did happen to me last year is that I began a new relationship with someone in France, I really do feel like I am in love with this person. It’s incredible because for so long I have felt like I was unworthy of love but I know that was in part because of my incredible sense of self hatred. Since starting this relationship I’m beginning to see that I am worth loving and am beginning to see the things in me that are worth loving to. It’s hard to explain but it’s a wonderful feeling.  

Needless to say I’ll be planning many more overseas trips now because of this. Though I don’t know when I’ll be returning to Europe yet because I’m waiting for something else to happen first, something I’ve been hoping to happen for a very long time, something I dare not even dream about that now seems frighteningly closer than I could ever imagine. But I know that wherever my next trip will take me, it will be amazing.

One of my goals for this year is to write more, so I will be making an honest to god effort to keep this blog as updates as I can from now on. I’ll be posting again later this week with an outline of the future of this blog, look forward to it!

Yours Jasmine 

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